the light that burns people's eyes
by aikotters
Summary: The two of them spend the long night as children again. Ran watches. Or, the aftermath of multiple decisions, such as cleaning the Kudo house in winter. AU. Part of crow's feet.


Edogawa Conan offered Mouri Ran a box of pillows with a shy smile and a 'Ran-nee-chan' that filled her eyes with guilt and love. Haibara Ai did the same when she carefully set the pile of blankets her small arms had strained over onto the sofa. Just quieter, more formal.

As far as they knew, she was guilty that the three of them were stuck in this big, drafty house. As far as they knew, she was guilty about the storm, and not being able to cook her father dinner, or that there were people worrying about them.

Ran seemed determined to keep it that way.

The two of them walked away from her towards the stove, their hands brushing together here and there like they don't know if it's safe to clasp them together or not. They share low whispers and a laugh, probably about something that happened the day before that they only share with the other children.

She watches them, before her body mechanically sets up comfortable spots in the blanket.

It's true, she does feel bad about this, because this was not justice. This was not being kind. This was not what she had thought it would be. In a way, the living was almost worse.

But this was what she had to live with, and she would. She had to be strong for them. So they couldn't suspect a thing. Besides, it was just a snowed night in. No harm done, right?

* * *

Nowadays, Edogawa Conan was a decent liar. It was never very hard before, but it was hard to be believable. No one really questioned bad lies unless you pushed them very, very hard. Or made it too obvious. And even then, all you needed was a distraction. As a child, it was even easier. When no one was around to question you, you could even lie to yourself for a while.

Even as Kudo Shinichi, "I'm fine" had always been his most reliable falsehood. It didn't always work, but so long as it worked enough he could go on.

"Is she scaring you?"

Haibara Ai, Miyano Shiho, his best friend, his first friend, his childhood friend, was such a strange person. Between her and Ran, Conan had often thought it was a miracle he still had earlobes. But she was the one who understood his thoughts the best, and he appreciated that about her some of the time. Sometimes she was just plain terrifying herself with that sort of awareness, and her own intrusive thoughts. It was difficult to deal with.

"She always scares me," he replied without thinking. They were behind the wall now, and far enough away from her prying gaze and uncomfortable frown. "She's my friend, why wouldn't she?"

"I think that's abuse, Edogawa-kun," Ai told him with a wry smile. "Or something for older ears." She didn't seem offended by that thoug

Conan rolled his eyes at her and moved back to the window. The sky was a murky grey, a rush of snow only visible under the light of the streetlights. "The street cleaners will have an awful time tonight."

"Mm," she agreed. "At least the kids aren't here." They'd be complaining by now, or making games of the whole thing. Or trying to reach the professor with bed sheets and a bookshelf.

"That might make her cheer up," he countered, eyes flickering worriedly to the other room. "I don't know what's the matter with her today. It's not even Christmas yet."

Haibara gave him a side-eye. "You are very dense, aren't you?"

"Oi oi." He settled in a chair. "I have a very limited amount of interests. And a girl who I spend every day with who I don't have feelings for but she thinks I do."

"Excuse you," Haibara said, eyebrows arching into the sun.

He gave her a look. "Not you, obviously. We talked about this."

"You could change your mind at any time." She shrugged her shoulders in an appearance of disinterest.

"And we've talked about how terrible I am at that. So."

She moved to sit beside him on the love seat that was fit for an adult and a half. "Fair enough, I suppose." They sat there for a while, fingertips brushing close. Conan stared up at the ceiling and she watched him do it. They could not let their guard down, of course, because there was still someone who could rat them out unknowingly in the house, even if it was Mouri Ran who would not mean to. But with the wall in the way, they could sit together and look like harmless children.

Harmless but for their minds. Their adolescent minds that had outstripped their peers before, and doubly so more now. But even their genius minds hadn't found a cure for their condition, or a way to bring their near murderers to light.

It was frustrating, but to Conan, at least they had each other. Haibara wasn't that kind of optimist, but she understood it. Understood his feelings, somewhat. If he wasn't optimistic, he'd just give up entirely. He was that kind of person. All or nothing.

But right now it was all, and she was going to indulge in it. Her fingers twined with his, clumsy with youthful imbalance and dry with the warmth of the Kudo house's heating system. He blinked and looked over at her, at the small smile crossing her face. He smiled back and folded their hands properly, dry palms touching.

"Just for a bit?" he said.

"Mmhm," she agreed. "What should we cook?"

"Something easy."

"I think you're too young to be on the menu."

"_Ouch." _He gave her a gentle knock on the arm.

They continued to bicker, arguing in low voices until Ran found them like that about ten minutes later. She scooped them up in an embarrassing hug, her cheer restored and determined to cook a good meal despite having nothing fresh that wasn't an unopened bag of rice. Neither of them complained and if she saw the two of them sitting beside her and Conan-kun reading the recipe in extra falsetto, or Ai-chan subtly adding diced peppers because she herself liked them when she was down, she didn't complain.

In fact, she liked it a bit more this way.

They ended up asleep on the couch, both of them obediently close little space heaters with quilts and pillows and Shinichi's ridiculous television playing those also ridiculous cooking shows Conan-kun pretended he hated and Ai-chan watched intently for tips to help keep the professor healthy.

All the while the snow piled up over the window in a rare Beika blizzard, touching the windowsill when the three of them woke up the next morning. It left the three of them dealing with varying size shovels and bags of concrete salt the size of the children's heads in the morning, but they got out at least.

Though once they made it to the professor's house the next day, she did tease them about being a cute couple. They both looked appropriately red-faced in front of their friends.

Ran, suspicions higher than ever, found this well-deserved.

And if she fell asleep on the couch and woke up with five children and another big blanket curled up nearby, well, she didn't mind.

(She snapped a picture of Conan-kun and Ai-chan holding hands again though. That was going in her evidence folder.)

* * *

_**A/N:**_ Happy holidays to all who celebrate at this time of year! This is going to be a part of an admittedly short AU on my part. I wanted to continue and I have a couple more ideas for it, but for the moment I want to pursue projects I've already got in progress. That said, once the last fic I have in mind is up, please contact me on tumblr or ao3 on if you want to get involved! This fic, in the meantime, is for fuji over on the coai cafe! It wasn't entirely CoAi, but I wanted something sweet and fluffy for us! I hope you enjoy it!


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